Where He Sends

by Emily Wickham

“When therefore it was evening, on that day, the first day of the week, and when the doors were shut where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst, and said to them, ‘Peace be with you.’” – John 20:19

Insecurity. It sort of plagues me.

Becoming an author and speaker has been an evolving process. I never planned to write for publication—though I’ve communicated for some time through the written word. As for public speaking, I still remember sharing devotions in high school. My eyelid twitched nervously nonstop! On a personal level, people have responded positively to my ministry endeavors. But the professional level feels out of my league. Too long … unpredictable … expensive. And I question whether I have what it takes.

Rejection. I’ve felt the sting.

Armed with proposals and waiting for my big break, I’ve attended the BRMCWC a few times—truly loving it overall. Smiling and connecting, scheduling and meeting, I’ve attempted to place quality material in front of editors. Yet nothing significant has resulted. Though I try to be myself and offer my best, my work remains … mine. While the dream of traditional publishing lingers, I’ve retreated. The pressure of impressing professionals disenchants me. Anticipating a “No, thank you”—or worse yet, the dreaded silence—discourages me from submitting another manuscript. I withdraw.

Fear. It prevents me.

Just as the disciples fearfully locked themselves in a room, I erect walls around me to assuage my fear. I won’t face rejection as long as I don’t venture into unknown territory. I won’t risk refusal if I don’t offer up precious projects for scrutiny. I won’t be considered “less than” as a writer if I don’t involve others’ opinions.

Perhaps this discussion resonates with you. Where have you retreated from rejection? What have your insecurities and fears prevented you from pursuing?

That’s where Jesus comes in. He literally penetrated the disciple’s room and soothingly shared peace. His presence removed their fear and renewed their joy. Seeing His scars reminded them of what He’d suffered. What He’d come through. He’d conquered death and stood before them in victory! He was with them.

I sense the Lord gently breaking into these barriers of my own making … whispering peace … urging me forward. He possesses a plan for my writing—for yours too. May we gain strength from His presence and grasp His peace to go where He sends.

“The disciples therefore rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus therefore said to them again, ‘Peace be with you; as the Father has sent Me, I also send you.’” -- John 20:20-21

 

 

Emily Wickham, founder of Proclaiming Him to Women Ministries, maintains a passion for teaching God’s Word. Her Bible study, Reaching for Righteousness: Life Applications from the Book of Esther, speaks into women’s hearts and challenges them to pursue righteousness. Her monthly Sophie Woman’s Magazine articles and weekly blog devotionals allow her to reach many with God’s truth. As a conference organizer and speaker, she appreciates every opportunity to encourage and equip women by exalting Christ. Please visit www.proclaiminghimtowomen.com for a closer look at her ministry.

Most importantly, Emily highly cherishes her relationship with God and treasures her family as gifts from His hand. Residing in western NC with her husband and their four children, she considers each day a blessing. 

Comments

[Jessica]

Emily,

Thank you for sharing this message. My discussion with the Lord touched on each of these same points this morning. Lord, I don't want to be rejected - again. Lord, who am I? I'm not in this league. Lord, I'm afraid. What if this dream just ends in failure?

Your message is timely and speaks directly to me as an answer from him. I may never be published, but I'll never know unless I try. If the Lord provides, I am committed to attending this conference in May!

[Emily Wickham]

Dear Jessica,

You're so welcome, and thank you for sharing your thoughts. I love that the Lord spoke to you in the same way ... He knows just what we need and when. I'm convinced when He plants a dream in our heart, it will never fail as we allow Him to direct our paths. It might come to fruition differently than we anticipate, but He always accomplishes His purpose.

I pray the Lord will continue to encourage you in your writing journey, and that He'll provide for your attendance at the conference.

In Christ's Love,
Emily

[andy lee]

This is such a powerful post and one to which so many of us can relate. Thank you for the reminder that we aren't alone. We aren't the only ones struggling but more importantly, we have Jesus. It makes me think of the old hymn: "Trust and obey for there is no other way to be happy in Jesus...but to trust and obey." I'll be singing that all day long. :)

[Emily Wickham]

Dear Andy,

Thank you for your kind words. The Lord has such a personal way of ministering to us when we struggle. And thanks for the reminder of "Trust and Obey" - singing with you because He is faithful. To God be the glory!

In Christ's Love,
Emily